The theme this summer at Summit Camps is “Poured Out” and it’s based on this verse: “Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.” (John 7:38). I guess that whole week I focused on reflecting Christ, that I never really stared at this verse and wondered what it was trying to tell me. In the weeks that we’ve been back from camp, God’s revealed to me that the whole purpose He called me to Bowie for the summer as a youth intern is in that verse.
My last two years of college, I’ve poured everything I have into other people: trying to be a good example, trying to get friends to come to church with me and encouraging my friends with their walks with God. But in all that time, who’s been pouring into me? I have some great friends, don’t get me wrong. It’s hard, though, when we all live in different places. Sometimes you just want to sit down and have a conversation, but it’s not the same over chat or Skype. The friends I’ve made at school are awesome, but it seems like something’s missing. We all have different aims and goals. I’m at the point where I feel like my gas tank is running low and there’s not a gas station in sight. We get so focused on figuring out what’s wrong with us that we’ve taken all control from God and thrown it on our backs. I’m definitely starting to feel the weight.
So here I am in a town I never thought I’d move to and I feel my walk with God getting stronger every day. These students are pouring into me more than I ever imagined. And I’ve gotten some amazing encouragement from Miles & Emily Morrison, the youth pastor and his wife that I’ve been friends with for years. Then all of a sudden – BAM. Curveball. And I was just starting to get comfortable.
All of my plans for next year have crumbled at my feet. My apartment and roommate plan…everything. I didn’t even bother to have a backup plan. That’s so unlike me. After a few different events, I found myself in the church office crying and saying, “I have nothing. I have no one. I don’t have anywhere to live next year.” After God let me have a good cry, He calmed my spirit and spoke through a dear friend.
God hasn’t gone anywhere. He has a plan for me. He has a place for me to live. He has friends for me that I haven’t met yet. I’m a control freak. It’s time for me to relinquish control and continue giving Him everything – even a plan I thought I had already made.
Something big is coming. Oh, yes, friend. God is moving and it’s going to be fantastic. Are you ready?
//I wrote this post last week and kept thinking something was missing – it wasn’t ready to be posted. Well, that’s because this hadn’t happened yet: This last weekend I went home and posted something on Facebook about needing furniture to fill an apartment I didn’t have, yet. That day, I received a leather recliner, a table and chairs, a coffee table, two side tables and my Nanny’s old couch. Praise God, my provider and shelter! Yesterday, I received a call that an apartment I applied for a few months ago and didn’t think I would get has freed up and they offered me a home! Praise God, my provider and shelter! The roommate search continues, but if God wants me to live alone and focus on Him and my school work, then so be it. As long as He is glorified, it’s fine with me!
Reading: “A Lineage of Grace” by (one of my favorite authors of all time) Francine Rivers